Worst part? These allegations were brought by current players, who admitted to signing NCAA compliance forms, saying they were told they would get in trouble if they did not.  As near as we can tell, it’s at least three or four current players, and try as they might, no news outlet has found any current or former players who will deny the allegations.

We went and looked up the rules about practice and workout time in and out of season, and they’re relatively straightforward, although some types of workouts fall into a gray area, as they count as individual, non-mandated workouts but can still be supervised by team staff and personnel for “safety reasons.”  Still, even fudging the definitions of various workouts, we’re unsure exactly how the team could let this happen, especially in a new coach’s first year when procedures are being put into place for the first time.

We hope Michigan gets treated more harshly than Memphis for many reasons, honestly.  First off, this wasn’t an eligibility issue, even a hugely egregious one like Memphis.  This is an issue of taking a whole team’s worth of student athletes and making them into full-time athletes…without paying them and without respect for their educational goals.

Now, we’re not saying that every athlete at every powerhouse program is an academic all-star, or even writes his or her own papers, though we’d love to believe that the vast majority do so.  But this sort of violation goes against the entire idea of a student-athlete, and the NCAA has a responsibility to its programs and its own mission to come down hard.

We’ll update as we get more.

Here’s today’s possible yum. We’re not sure yet:

The Brigham Young football team.  We’re not sure if this picture is hilarious, or what exactly.

Pros:

–Your date is clean cut–no cursing, drinking, etc.

–Depending on which member you pick, you can have your choice of adorable-yet-manly footwear: work-boot type items or Converse!

–Clearly they understand old cinema–in this case, Larry, Moe and Curly.  Conversation can ensue!

–Probably the marrying type.

Cons:

–You can’t get coffee, because he doesn’t drink coffee.  What will you do on your first date?

–Possibly about to decamp to Africa for mission work. Could happen at any time.

–Modeling experience liable to go to his head.  Will soon be working on his own version of Blue Steel.

Verdict?

No yum here.  But hey, whatever floats your boat….

But today, Appalachian State had some bad news: their quarterback, three-time All-American Armanti Edwards, is out for 2-4 weeks with….a mowing injury?  Yup. He was mowing his lawn.  Now, UPH lives in what we’ll charitably call an urban mecca (there’s certainly enough traffic!), and thus has no lawn.  But we’re pretty sure we’ve previously mowed one without running over our foot…

Other sports injuries that make UPH feel coordinated?

–In 2001, Leeds United’s Rio Ferdinand spent too long with his feet on the coffee table…and strained a muscle in his tendon when he got up for his next beer.

–in 1995, Milan Rapaic of Hajduk Split in the Balkans missed a game after he stuck his boarding pass in his eye while boarding his flight.

–Atlanta Braves manager Roger Craig once cut his hand on a bra strap.  We assume he took one for the team and kept playing…

–Ken Griffey Jr. once missed a game because he pinched himself in his own cup. Ow. UPH clearly has not ever done this, but we told this story to our boyfriend, and he cringed.

–And finally, relief pitcher Greg Harris of the Texas Rangers injured his wrist….flicking sunflower seeds in the dugout.

So, we couldn’t join a team, but we’re excited at a new-ish oppurtunity popping up for chicks just like us: women’s football clinics at universities around the country.  Some teams, like the Rice Owls, tried it for the first time, while storied programs like Texas Tech  put together elaborate fashion shows and dinners to go with their tackles and huddles.

The Fighting Illini offered some new and different ball placement advice to it’s female recruits: “Keep the ball high and tight,” said the coach, “like my [butt]“*.  We guess that, as they say at Clemson, what happens at Ladies Football Clinic stays at Ladies Football Clinic.

*Swear to God, we didn’t make this up.